Talk like a HAWESOME! (and New England trivia)

"Hawesome" comes from New Englanders saying things certain ways. Take the quiz to see if you have the knowledge and what it takes to sounds like a Hawesome.

(For answers, just hover your mouse inside the boxes below - you don't need to click)

What is "New England"?

  1. England 2.0
  2. A place just above England.
  3. Isn't that in Canada?
  4. The six United States of Connecticut, Massachusetts, Rhode Island, New Hampshire, Maine and Vermont.
ANSWER: The answer is D. If I hear one more person say "Vermont? What state is that in?" I will punch that person in the face. Repeatedly.

"New Hampshire" sounds like:

  1. New Hampshire (properly said as new-hamp-shire with shire like fire)
  2. New Hamp-Sheer
  3. New Hamp-Shurr
ANSWER: The answer is C. "Shurr" is more commonly used when pronouncing the state's name.

"Worcester" sounds like:

  1. Woor-cess-terr
  2. Wooster
  3. Wiss-tah
ANSWER: The answer is C. Worcester is a town in Massachusetts and is pronounced "Wiss-tah". Some say "Wiss-terr".

"Someone passed me traveling at a velocity of over one hundred miles per hour on the highway!" would be said like:

  1. Someone passed me traveling at a velocity of over one hundred miles per hour on the highway!
  2. This jerky passed me doin' over a hundred!
  3. Some dude passed me doin' over a buck on the 'Pike!

    Bonus question: What is "The Pike?"

ANSWER: The answer is C. Someone "doin' over 100" is referred to as "doin' over a buck". "The Pike" is the Massachusetts Turnpike, which is Interstate 90.

"Crayon" sounds like:

  1. Cray-On
  2. Cran
  3. Crown
ANSWER: The answer is A. "Cray-on" is the proper pronunciation. "Cran" is said by some New Yorkers (which can happen if you say "crayon" very fast). "Crown" is used by southerners who don't know how to pronounce crayon correctly and are under the delusion that you can completely replace the "ay" in "crayon" with an "ow" like "wow" sound. For some strange reason they think that's correct - and it's not.

"Rhode Island" sounds like:

  1. Road Aisle-and
  2. Row-aisle-and
  3. Rudd'isle-ann
ANSWER: The answer is C. Rhode Island usually comes out as just one word. What sounds like "road' turns into "rudd".

"Interstate" sounds like:

  1. Inner-state
  2. Inner-stade
  3. The highway
ANSWER: The answer is C. Most people don't refer to interstates as interstates. They just say "take the highway".

What would a typical response be to "Wow, it's a nice day today!"

  1. Why yes, it certainly is a nice day. How wonderful of you to notice.
  2. Yeah, enjoy it while you can.
  3. Sun and clouds suck.
ANSWER: The answer is B. New Englanders are eternal pessimists. If it's nice one day, tomorrow must obviously be a bad day coming.

A married couple exits from church just after a sermon and the wife notices someone dented her car. What would she say?

  1. Oh, my! Someone dented my car.
  2. Harry! Some asshole dented my cah!
  3. OH WHAT THE F--.. MY BUICK! JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. GADDAM IT, I JUST PAID THIS STUPID THING OFF! LOOKIT THIS! WHO THE FUCK DENTS A CAH IN A CHURCH PAH-KING LAHT?!
ANSWER: The answer is C. Even the most devout New Englander Christians will start taking the Lord's name in vain when it suits (and having your car dented in a church parking lot certainly qualifies). When this happens, no one is surprised or gives dirty looks. In fact, if there were other people nearby, they would agree and offer condolences instead of saying "You really shouldn't take the Lord's name in vain in a church parking lot, you fucking moron."

Two cars are at a red light, one behind the other. The light turns green and the car in front does not move. What is the reaction by the person in the second car?

  1. The second car waits patiently under the first car moves.
  2. The second car gives a polite "honk honk" to alert the car in front that the light is green.
  3. The second car blares his horn, rolls down the window and says "THE LIGHT IS GREEN! MOVE IT, YOU REE-TAHD!"
ANSWER: The answer is C. New Englanders have absolutely no patience for morons who won't go when a light turns green, and why should we? We have places to go.

"Enjoy the summer weath-ah, dee-ah!" is indigenous to what New England state?

  1. Connecticut
  2. Massachusetts
  3. Rhode Island
  4. Maine
  5. New Hampshire
  6. Vermont
ANSWER: The answer is D. Maine's summers are extremely short, so the "summer weath-ah, dee-ah" phrase is popularized.

"KILO BRAVO ONE VICTOR MEXICO" refers to what?

  1. A Ham Radio operator's call sign
  2. A military installation designation
  3. A secret code that only New Englanders know about.
ANSWER: The answer is A. Newington Connecticut is home to the Amateur Radio Relay League (ARRL). The above (KB1VM) is said using the phonetic alphabet. KB1VM by the way is my Pop's call sign. (grin)

Friend #1 is sitting in a car waiting for Friend #2 to arrive. He arrives, but as he's getting in the car, Friend #2 bumps his head on the door. What's the reaction by Friend #1?

  1. Dude! You okay?
  2. HAHAHAHAHA you fuckin' ree-tahd! BWHAHAHAHAA
  3. You seem to have injured yourself.
ANSWER: The answer is B. If a friend sees another friend injure himself in a non life-threatening way, New Englanders will take every opportunity to laugh at someone else's expense. Once done laughing, then they will offer support.

"Butter" sounds like:

  1. Budder
  2. Budd-ah
  3. Butt-terr
ANSWER: The answer is A. Answer B is what New Yorkers say. Butter is one of the few words ending in "er" where we actually do pronounce the "er".

"Steamers" refer to what?

  1. Clams
  2. Lobster claws
  3. Burgers
ANSWER: The answer is A. Steamers are small clams.

"Milk" sounds like:

  1. Mill-k
  2. Mee-ill-k
ANSWER: The answer is A. "Mee" does not exist in "milk". That's why it has an i and not two e's.

The letter "W" if said outright as a letter sounds like:

  1. Double-you
  2. Dubba-you
  3. Dub-yew
ANSWER: The answer is B. Answer C is the southern version because they sometimes omit the middle syllable.

Massachusetts is a state. True or false?

  1. True
  2. False
ANSWER: The answer is B. Massachusetts is not a state. Along with Virginia, it is a commonwealth.

Shane Nickerson sounds like:

  1. Shane Nickerson
  2. Shane Nickah-sun
ANSWER: The answer is B. The "er" is replaced with "ah". New Englanders with thicker accents will do this.

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